32-F

Raising the plastic shade on my porthole disclosed little but a grey-white blur. Shaking off my dozing grogginess, I stopped the audiobook drone that had napped me away. The low jostle of turbulence needed some libation and a reminisce through familiar old tunes. After the cobwebs began to fully clear, I seconded my check of the world outside, just as those slow jogging chords began to lilt from the lower middle keys. I found myself transfixed by a vision.

A soft grey floor of woolen tufts extended out to a broad amber halo, which wreathed the edge of the world. Crisp dihedral edges rose against this backdrop, a slanted limb of un-feathered raven. An upturned winglet quavered over the burning Western rim. It played gently at the feet of the great azure vault, which rose unbounded and receded to the endless deep above. And suspended there, motionless as I hurtled in a southward streak, somewhere between space and the false floor of cotton below, the poet began to intone:

Imagine there’s no Heaven

It’s easy if you try

No Hell below us

Above us, only sky

I simply drank in the moment as John Lennon played on. The burden of yesteryear mythology slipped away, even as I watched Helios dance out a final flourish of brilliance. The great concerns of new war and rising plague faded, along with all such noises from below. The battles of cancelled flights and strained projects dissolved into a lightness of mind and a simple hope. I am going home. Home to the faces and the smiles of my everything. Home. It is such a small word to represent the sum of what matters.

Meanwhile, thankfulness rises for many things that I didn’t think I wanted. It took a flight cancellation. It needed a late departure. It required a West-facing window seat. I find myself inconsolably grateful for this constellation of random events, and grateful to have John Lennon and Ian McEwan to keep me company. Meanwhile, the plump and smiling face of 32-E asks me trivialities from time to time. That seems somehow fitting.

Comments

  1. Thanks Matt.
    A moment’s meditation indeed makes the world a richer place!
    Your writing evokes the lingering imprint of McEwan’s company indeed.

    PS. I trust 32-E wasn’t your beloved wife, then. 🙂

    Like

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Michael Seidel, writer

Science fiction, fantasy, mystery and what-not

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My freedom from spiritual abuse happened when I walked away from the abusers. My healing and recovery from the complex trauma of spiritual abusers, spiritually abusive faith and toxic religion happened while I was still a Christian and continues to this day. My deconversion came later after many many years of studying the Bible, Christian apologetics, cults and spiritual abuse. When I realized that the Bible is not the inerrant Word of God, the only honest thing I could do was to stop calling myself a Christian. What I write here, may be very different from what I’ve written in the past. It might also be repeats of the past themes. ~ Zoe

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